These are my Momentos, short personal diary entries I write daily – since 2013 – and publish monthly. Some links are affiliate links.
1
Outra dia, outra feira. They happen eight days a week here in Belo Horizonte. This one is a big Italian dealio, just a short walk from Casa Gringo, a dozen or so blocks full of beautiful people and overpriced pasta. I spend a couple of hours wandering into conversations, swapping dance moves, and butchering the local language. Pode deixar!
2
Do things even when you don’t want to do them, even when it’s easier not to. I reckon that’s a big key to kicking ass right there. I didn’t want to go workout this morning, easier to stay in bed and avoid the mud. But I went anyway. And I didn’t want to cold call those clinics and do idea extraction this afternoon, easier to busy myself with freelance work. But I made those calls anyway.
3
The Portuguese is coming along slowly. I’d love to immerse myself in it 24/7, but I don’t have the time or the mental energy with all the balls I’m juggling. Speaking practice is the big thing, and I’m aiming for at least fifteen solid minutes a day. Unfortunately, Brazilians are quite flaky. Four out of five Skype chats have either been late or no-shows.
4
Waiting for the man, find myself alongside uma gatihna. I know I’ll regret it if I don’t say something, so I tap her elbow and say hello, you look nice, wanted to meet you. Just then the man goes green. She gives me a frightened glance and accelerates across the street, while a chemical reaction in my brain produces a slight feeling of embarrassment.
5
2am right now, and we have to be up in five hours for a parkour workout. Spent a good stretch at the feirinha tonight, then hanging at a bar with a bunch of Couchsurfers. I can’t wrap my head around the dating scene here. There doesn’t seem to be any pattern, any best way to go about it. All I know is rapid-fire approaching isn’t getting me very far.
6
“Is this going to take much longer?”, she asks. I throw one more question at her, the one I should have thrown first, then request an email address so I can keep her updated on any solutions I come across. “No thanks. I’d rather not.” I thank her and hang up, then spend a few minutes reflecting. Some good lessons learned, I conclude. All in all, a successful call.
7
I’m at a low point right now, can’t say I’m a happy man. Money worries are exhausting. Trading time for money is exhausting. The dating game is exhausting. Client management is exhausting. Trying to learn Portuguese is exhausting. Living with other people is exhausting. Feeling like I was having the exact same struggles three years ago… exhausting.
8
My first ever job was at a hotel in my hometown. I was seventeen and legally not supposed to work past midnight, but they had me mopping up wedding puke mixed with broken glass at four in the morning. I remember my mantra: “Everything comes and everything goes.” Those shifts always came to an end. This too shall pass.
9
I was trying to move away from hourly rates. Charge by the project they said, not by the hour. It’s much better that way. But as I’ve learned in recent weeks, it depends on the client. Those who get distracted by shiny objects and seem intent on throwing new requests at you every six minutes? Charge by the hour, stay sane, make a fortune.
10
Another 36-hour fast completed, my second in a fortnight. This started out as punishment, but I may keep doing it once a week just for kicks. The body is getting knocked into great shape, and this seems to be helping. Plus, I’m a sucker for a self-discipline challenge. Oh, and not eating is by far the best cure I’ve found for flatulence 😉
11
There’s a sign in the park, right at the spot where we practice Parkour, that says you’re not allowed practice Parkour. It’s probably my favorite type of exercise. You build a practical skill — it isn’t called “the art of escape” for nothing — while getting a kick-ass workout. And you feel like a bit of a ninja all the while. Now if I could just crack that kong vault.
12
World Cup, full moon, unwelcome advance. I thought a peck on the lips would humor her, but she wants the full-on make out. Kissing culture is weird here. She was just eating face with another dude two minutes ago. Now she wants an explanation as to why I’m not game, becoming insistent, dragging a friend over to help with the interrogation. The truth will hurt.
13
This is my best shot to get my money right, these few months in Belo Horizonte. Once I leave town at the end of August, I won’t be stopping in any one place for more than a month or two until I get back to Ireland. So if the choice is between kicking back and enjoying the Copa, or working hard so I’m not treading water for the next eighteen months, I’ll take the latter.
14
Cheat day consisted of two big bars of chocolate, half a chocolate cake, two chicken and cheese pizzas, a bowl of oatmeal mixed with muesli, two ice creams, half a batch of french fries, four pão de queijo, another bowl of muesli, plus my regular breakfast of lentils, tomato, spinach, chicken and egg. I’m probably in the best shape of my life right now.
15
I didn’t go outside today. I just stayed in and worked. All day on a Sunday. I’m now twenty four hours over on one project. That’s twenty four hours I didn’t foresee and didn’t charge for. At my minimum rate of $50 an hour, that’s $1,200 I’ve lost out on. Nobody’s fault but mine. Poor salesmanship, poor client management, very little self-respect right now.
16
Skipped going out to watch the German game with the gang. Skipped going out to watch the USA game, too. Stayed in and cold called a dozen businesses in Australia to validate a pain point I heard rumor of last week. No dice, unfortunately. On the plus side, I’ve gotten a lot better on the phone. I’m not intimidated anymore, and I’m failing faster.
17
We wait a good twenty minutes in the crowd but they’re not letting anyone in, no explanation as to why. Ridiculous, kickoff has come and gone. Are they trying for a riot? We ditch the mob and walk down the west side of the Expo. Kids are hopping a fence and I’m game to follow. Clamber, drop, turn. Two polícia on horseback, bearing down.
18
I take solace in the story of Roald Amundsen, that twenty mile march. I’m confident that if I just keep putting in an hour a day on the software business, I’ll eventually break through. It may take another month, or it may take a year, but as long as I keep showing up and putting forth the effort, success is inevitable. That said, I’m wee bit impatient over here.
19
I always try acknowledge them at least. It must suck to have people constantly pretend you don’t exist. So I see this guy on the way in and give him a nod. Black teen, skinny. He has his hand out again when I exit the store. I look right at him a second time and keep on walking. I don’t give money to strangers on the street. But wait, I’ve got a bag full of groceries…
20
Tai Lopez talks about the law of 33 percent: spend a third of your time with people less successful than you (help them out, boost your self-esteem), a third with people on your level (friendship and support), and a third with people way ahead of you (create the burn, shift your mindset). Most avoid the last third, he says. They can’t handle it. I’m among the most.
21
I’ve had a hundred walks like this. Foreign city, late at night, all alone. New Orleans, Amsterdam, Budapest, Bucharest, Tehran, Mumbai, Kathmandu, Bangkok, Luang Prabang, Hong Kong, Chongqing, Busan, Kyoto, Cusco, Rio… feels lonely yet it feels right, a path I continue to consciously choose. No idea where it leads, or when it ends.
22
I keep saying it: there must be consequences to shitty behavior. That person must be called out. Otherwise, if nobody says anything, there’s no incentive for that person to change or make amends. But fuck me does my people-pleasing get in the way of the whole calling-out bit. I naturally shy away from confrontation, have to force myself to speak up.
23
I’m no longer willing to hang in there just to get laid, often checking out early for a good night’s sleep. The thought process goes, “Yeah, I could soldier on to the end of the night and probably take this girl home with me, but a) I barely know her, and b) I want to get up early and be productive tomorrow. Sometimes though, your buddy needs a wingman, so you soldier on.
24
Forro class, must be seventy people here tonight. You fight the urge to run from the building. Everyone seems to glide while you sputter. You’re right at your edge, and — to make matters worse — your body is pressed up against a succession of hot Brazilian girls while you bumble through countless fuck ups. Welcome to the pain period. All roads to success pass through this town.
25
There will always be exceptions, but for the most part, I believe the people who succeed are those who deserve success, those who have earned it. The guy who dates amazing women on the regular? He deserves it. The guy with the long-thriving business that adds real value to the world? He earned it. To get what most people want, you gotta do what most people won’t.
26
I try not to, but I do get resentful. Resentful of friends here in Belo Horizonte, off doing the fun stuff while I stay in and work. Resentful of friends I see on Facebook posting pics of what seems to be a never-ending holiday. The resentment is childish and stupid, I know. I’ve made a conscious choice to be where I’m at, doing what I’m doing.
27
As requested, I custom-built a bare-bones system for a wholesaler in Australia. Last night via Skype I gave her a walk through, her first time seeing it up and running. She loved it. I asked if many other people in the industry would be interested in similar. “Yeah, at least a hundred from the UK and Australia alone.” The march goes on.
28
Watching Brazil shoot penalties in a parallel universe. We ended up at the wrong bar, one with cupids aplenty. A gay dude introduces us to his barbie doll amiga, asks if we like. A middle-aged lady brings us a gatihna each, asks if we’re interested. Three kicks in and I’ve got a foreign hand on my knee while my buddy makes out with the girl he just met.
29
Working most of the weekend through and yet I barely did anything on the software business, freelance projects all-consuming. This is a problem. I gotta earn and pay the bills, but ultimately it’s the software biz that will take me where I want to go. But this is good, this squeeze. I’m (re)learning how to say no and demand fair payment for my services.
30
All aboard the intermittent fasting train now, upping it to two 24-hour fasts per week. Health benefits aplenty, but more than anything I’m digging the simplicity. Less time spent buying, preparing and eating food. Approximately four hours saved from those forty-eight. Plus, you know I’m a sucker for a self-discipline challenge. Working that willpower muscle.