These are my Momentos, short personal diary entries I write daily – since 2013 – and publish monthly. Some links are affiliate links.
1
A little old Estonian lady just asked me to help her cross the street. So I did, guiding her across with her little hand in mine. She was very slow. It took about a minute, and the traffic had to wait for us. I couldn’t stop smiling after. Like she had given me a gift or something. Might have to start hanging out at crosswalks now, looking for another fix.
2
“Be careful with those Russian girls.” I’ve heard some variation of that a few times now. Amazes me that people actually say it with a straight face, somehow not realizing that they’re painting eighty million women with one judgemental brush. I wonder does the same thing happen in reverse, people telling my girl to be wary of those Irish men, with their penchant for alcoholism and fisticuffs.
3
Climbed a steep staircase up an 800-year-old wall. There’s a cafe up here, quiet with a nice view and little birds hunting for crumbs. Two cups of tea cost €8, but I’m remembering what a friend said earlier, about being grateful to pay for experiences you value. This, right here, this conversation with this backdrop, is easily worth the price of admission.
4
Terrorist attack in London. I skim the headlines for a minute and decide that’s enough. Circle of influence, circle of concern. Dwelling on that shit doesn’t help me or anyone else. I’ll rest today, after a long work week, maybe take a walk in the park, then get after it again tomorrow, focused on that first circle, pushing it to expand.
5
Here in Tallinn I’ve been getting up early and knocking out a 20-30 minute park workout before breakfast. This morning was stretching, a quick circuit, plus some grip and balance work. That’s two months now of exercising at least ten minutes per day. Combined with the cold showers, I’m wondering if I have more energy these days. Don’t seem to be sleeping as much.
6
Actually, no, wait. That was just a flow and today came the ebb. Burnt out. Needed a day of resting up and doing nothing. Took me a few hours to stop hating myself and embrace the lull. Then I dug in and enjoyed the be-jesus out of a colossal Netflix binge. Still squeezed in the ten minutes of exercise though. Wasn’t so burnt out that I was willing to lose $200.
7
Last week I came across an ad for some cloud-based software that sounded great. The sales page was slick. The price was amazing. But I did a quick bit a googling, found a bunch of negative reviews, and decided not to buy. Simple as that. Makes me wonder how people get scammed online. I’ve never been caught out. Seems so easy to find the truth and steer clear of any swindle.
8
Not having a great week. Motivation is lacking. Part of it is that natural downswing, but I’m also feeling fairly isolated here. I miss being surrounded by entrepreneurial types like I was down in Las Palmas for the winter. Not quite the same coworking scene in Tallinn. Although when I ask myself honestly, I guess I’ve barely looked.
9
An open cafe in a bright, family-friendly mall isn’t where you’d expect to be challenged to a fist fight. This dude is drunk in the middle of the day, looking for trouble. We have a few words and he ends up shaking my hand and walking away, but I’m left shook, heart pounding. I’ve never been in a fight, wouldn’t know how to handle myself. Might be time I started acquiring a particular set of skills.
10
First time I arrived in Moscow it was all dark and wet and grey and they’d lost my luggage and I didn’t know how the metro worked. This time it’s early and warm and sunny and my luggage was there as soon as I reached the belt and I’m flowing from one train to the next to the center of the city. Only thing the same is that my girl is here to meet me at the end of the line. And that’s the most important thing.
11
At a little artisan coffee shop by a lake. There’s a bike lane out on the street and a row of nice cars, people going by on roller blades and walking their dogs. This could be so many places in the world. Belgium or Boston, Bangkok or Brisbane. I thought Moscow would be very different somehow, but no, not really. Normal people living their lives like anywhere else.
12
Coaching a guy to build better habits and turn his life around. He’s supposed to do just five minutes of exercise per day this week, starting small. He failed on day three. Trying to let him know that it’s not the failure that matters; it’s what you say to yourself after, and how you bounce back. Fuck knows I’ve been a lazy mess the past ten days, but I refuse to give up on me.
13
Upping the price of 3M1K at the end of the month. About a 33% increase. Easily warrants that. First launched it eighteen months ago and it’s only gotten better since. People who’ve joined tell me it’s under-priced, that they’d happily have paid more for all the value they’ve received. And I still believe it’s the most important work I can be doing, helping people break free.
14
Been in this coffee shop for the past seven hours, head down getting shit done. Cafe latte and a club sandwich, publish that interview with the subtitler, write a thousand words, cappucino, write two thousand words, pasta and a pot of tea, process emails and Facebook messages. Almost time to call a cab, head across town and jump on a Skype call.
15
Been thinking a lot about leadership lately, looking for any opportunity to practice. Dog walking, for instance. Did that this morning, and realized I was going at the dog’s pace. She was leading me. And I was giving in to her every tug on the leash. But by the end we were going at my pace, and she was beginning to understand that no amount of tugging would get her what she wanted.
16
It’s easy enough to delete a shitty comment, or walk away from someone disrespectful. But can you stop thinking about them after they’re gone? That’s the hard part, evicting them from your head, rather than let them live there and wreck the place, rent free. I think it was Jodie Foster who said, “In the end, winning is sleeping better.”
17
Upcoming travel plans: flying to Istanbul the first week of July, will spend a few days there for my lady’s birthday. After that it’s on to Thailand solo for a couple of weeks, going to dive into some fight training and get humbled. Then I’ll head up to Japan and meet up with herself again after she’s done with a work trip. We’ll spend several days exploring that dainty land before heading back west.
18
Getting the podcast rolling again with the Cuz. Aiming to do one episode per month now, which would be a big improvement over our one-every-four-months pace so far. Recorded close to two hours this evening on the topic of violence and fight training. Not sure if anyone will listen or care, but if nothing else it’s a good excuse to have more conversations with my best friend.
19
A good day for the biz. Got a bunch of stuff done, sold two copies of the Cheap Flight Checklist, and had five people sign up for 3M1K. Announcing the upcoming price increase for the latter surely didn’t hurt. Though as I told a friend today, it’s still very hard to predict how 3M1K will do from one month to the next. Zero sales the rest of the month wouldn’t surprise me, nor would twenty.
20
When you run your own business, you can be more flexible but you need to be more disciplined. It’s a double-edged sword. I take a nap after lunch pretty much every day and this afternoon we cycled through the woods to a nice park and lay in the sun for a while. But now it’s 11:33pm and I’m stuck at my laptop with my shoulders tense trying to finish some work and get to bed.
21
What goes through your mind when you see someone crushing it? Maybe a friend on Facebook with a ripped physique or somebody in the same line of work making a lot more money than you? Are you happy for them? Jealous? Critical? Would you feel the same if you were at their level? Do your current thoughts help you get there? Or do they hold you back?
22
Moscow is growing on me. At first, second and third glance it’s a big impersonal metropolis with harsh buildings and stern faces. But the longer I stay, the more I’m finding the beauty and warmth here. That park the other day, for instance. And this evening, on a boat full of songs and smiles, alongside scenic riverbanks and a glowing sky.
23
Words from Authority Hacker help explain some serious resistance I’ve been feeling this week: “Trying to get into SEO and not taking the time to learn the skill of building links is like trying get good at dating but refusing to talk to people… people are afraid of those two things (building links and talking to someone you’re attracted to) for the same reason: fear of rejection.”
24
People are so bad at discourse, man. Just read through a Facebook thread for an article on feminism, and pretty much everyone involved is attacking, judging, criticizing. So much anger, so much hate. Nobody says, “Let me see if I understand you correctly…” or “Can you clarify this point for me?” No minds are being broadened or changed. What the fuck are we doing?
25
With that in mind, when it came time to have ourselves a deep talk yesterday, while walking and rolling along by the river as the sun went down, I tried my best to follow the advice of a man who died five years ago. Seek first to understand, then to be understood. We leaned into the discomfort, and I reckon we emerged better for it.
26
The more successful 3M1K becomes, the more people it helps and the more testimonials I receive, the less aggressive my marketing. Feeling like I’ve amassed so much good content and feedback now that it mostly speaks for itself, and people are responding accordingly. It’s like a guy who worked hard for years chasing tail. Now he’s finally developed some significant substance and self-assurance, and finds himself getting better results with less effort.
27
Certain movies, books and podcasts bring back memories of time and place. Dark Knight Rises brings me back to Kathmandu. Mindless Eating has me just off the cargo ship in Lima. Sometimes the memory is hazy though, like that first Ryan Holiday episode on the Tim Ferriss podcast. I remember being on a bus, looking out at a brown hill, possibly in Bolivia.
28
Ten at night, sitting in the glow of two monitors, using an ironing board as a make-shift desk in this sparsely furnished apartment. Out the window and in the distance I see apartment blocks silhouetted against an orange sky. Been working pretty much the whole day, mostly just me and the machine. Now time for a yogurt-y treat. It’s been a good day.
29
Crazy how a pending price increase lights a fire under people. Deadline is midnight, regular sales coming in from folks who’ve been on my list for eons. It’s now a record-breaking month for 3M1K. But no time to relax. More members means more work helping them crush it. Ultimately, I don’t win unless they do.
30
Recorded an interview today with an Irish lady who works online writing about travel and visited 31 countries last year, a few of them on sponsored trips. Not so long ago she had a two-hour commute and twelve-hour work days at an office in Dublin. Now she goes where she wants, does what she wants. It’s a great time to be alive.
