These are my Momentos, short personal diary entries I write daily – since 2013 – and publish monthly. Some links are affiliate links.
1
Just had the last call with my coach. Paid him $15,000 for the past six months of coaching. People have asked me if it’s been worth it. I’m not sure there’s an answer to that question. Maybe a year from now there will be. I’ve learned a lot, and I have much still to think about and reflect on. Deep work can take a while to bear fruit.
2
Been going a bit mad on the coffee the past month so taking a week off. Day three today and almost cracked, felt sluggish and wasn’t getting much work done. Then I got pissed off. No way I should be that dependent on a brown drink to be productive. Made myself sit down and rip through some client work. Felt better after.
3
First came to Las Palmas two years ago, and have spent several months here altogether. You’d think I’d know the city pretty well by now, but no. Explored the north of the city this eve, loads of little streets up there I’d never seen. And a castle, apparently the oldest building in the Canary Islands.
4
Full-on video mode today, must get it done by EOD tomorrow or pay a $1000 penalty. Had it scripted out but had to shoot everything and start editing. Got obsessive about it, lost in the flow, time melting away. It was dark when I came out of the trance, nobody home. Not sure I’m even halfway finished. Might have to do the same again tomorrow.
5
Early morning, standing under a red sky, telling her I’m going to quit. It’s been three years since I launched that course. Good results, great reviews, but very poor ROI for me. 123 people went through the sales series this week, not one sale. Something fundamentally broken there. But I’m excited. I reckon I know a better way.
6
Step sprints. Agreed with a buddy that I’d do at least four sessions this month. At a nearby stadium now putting in the work. Thirty seconds to sprint up, a minute to get back down, repeat. Told myself I’d do eleven, but I’ve done twelve. Heaving at the end of it and legs shaking when I try to walk. Feels good, in a strange way.
7
I didn’t grow up in a physically affectionate culture, so it’s still strange for me meeting and greeting people in Gran Canaria with hugs and kisses. Often I don’t initiate, because it still feels unnatural. I know people here a while who I never greet that way, and I feel the air of awkwardness. But if I start doing it now, perhaps that’s even more awkward.
8
Met a guy at a rooftop party last night. Moved to Gran Canaria with his wife and two kids because they determined it was the best place to raise a family. Better than Italy, better than Malta, better than other parts of Spain. Great schools, great healthcare, very safe, warm weather, friendly culture, low taxes… there’s a lot to like about this place.
9
I love these bike sharing programs they have in many cities nowadays. The one in Las Palmas is a bit buggy but still works good enough. Unlocked a couple with our phones this eve and cruised on down to Las Canteras. Walked up and down the promenade for a while, listening to smooth trumpet, sipping a matcha.
10
Sitting in the kitchen with herself and this American chap, getting lost in the conversation. Talking about ideas and passions, depth and nuance, the kind of talk that has you vowing to be better, stronger, wiser, more caring, more open-hearted. Been feeling anti-social lately, but it’s not that I don’t like meeting new people. I just don’t like small talk. Thankfully, joyfully, this ain’t that.
11
Live video today was a rant about hustle culture, those people who say you should work hard, always be grinding. When you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe, then you’ll be successful! Ah, no. That’s madness. On certain days, we all need that kind of tough talk, but just as often we need the opposite: someone telling us to slow down, take a day off, have yourself a Netflix binge and don’t beat yourself up about it.
12
First day of talks at Nomad City. It’s nice to kick back and enjoy something like this and have no responsibilities, just stroll from talk to talk and chat with random people. I spoke at the first Nomad City two years ago, and it’s come a long way since then, now at the best venue in town, companies like Google and Evernote on the agenda. This way of working is only getting bigger.
14
Started reading a novel last night. Finished it this evening. That’s 39 books so far this year. Two tips for reading more books. First: spend more time reading books. Second: skip, skim and abandon. No need to read every word, every paragraph, or even every chapter. Speed through the fluff and slow down for the good stuff.
15
Told my students today that I’m shutting down the course. Lots of kind word
s and support. A couple of cancelled payments. And a definite sadness hovering over me. I know I gave it my best shot and helped a lot of people, and I’m sure good things will come from this change, but it still sucks to be packing it in after three years.
16
A few years back in Brazil there was a lot of uncertainty in my business. So I started working out a lot more. I think it was to regain a sense of control. I wasn’t sure how I’d earn money that month, but I knew I could bang out a few circuits each day. Right now I’m going through a transition period with my business, uncertainty creeping in, feeling that strong urge to exercise again.
17
On top of the exercise, I’m also exerting more control over my diet. I used to eat super-healthy six days a week and then, if I’d earned it, do a cheat day on Saturdays. Stopped that earlier this year, but have slipped a bit too much now, throwing cheesecake and coffee into my face whenever I feel like it. Time to get back on track.
18
Heard about two things making headlines on a podcast today: that Kanye fiasco at the White House, and that scary IPCC climate change report. Now I consider myself a fairly level-headed person with my priorities in order and not at all interested in celebrity ridiculousness. But of course I went and googled the Kanye thing first. Which tells me we’re all fucking doomed.
19
After a while you get a feel for who’s going to buy and who won’t. That guy last month who asked for one more week to buy at a discount. Gave him the extra week; never heard from him again. Someone messaged me today asking if my course is any good – the kind of question that doesn’t inspire confidence.
20
Thinking back a few years, remembering some lonely times, longing to meet someone. I’ve since found her, and we’re spending the weekend exploring scenic villages in volcanic craters. I tell her that if we were on a colony spaceship and her hibernation pod malfunctioned and she would be alone for 90 years, I’d definitely want her to wake me up.
21
Thinking a lot about incentives lately. Facebook is broken because their customer is the advertiser, not the user. They’re incentivized to keep the advertisers happy first and foremost. On a personal level, I’ve found myself complaining too much the past few weeks. To correct course, I need an incentive, and I reckon I found a good one.
22
On second thought, there are some very smart people working at Facebook. I’m sure they’ve crunched the numbers and run fancy simulations on switching from an advertising model to a subscription model. If it made sense they’d do it, but apparently it does not make sense. Not financial sense, anyways.
23
Fell deep down the numerology rabbit hole this morning, got lost for a good five hours. Request a numerology report about yourself and it’s easy to believe it. They make you sound awesome. But run the numbers for people like Hitler and bin Laden and you quickly see how full of shit the whole thing is. Well, at least that one particular website. But that one seems to have the biggest following, so probably doing the most damage.
24
If you refused to jump into a river to save a drowning child because you were wearing a $1000 suit, you’d be an asshole. Meanwhile, on any given day you can go online and donate much less than that to save a child’s life. But you don’t do that, do you? Not on a regular basis, anyway. And neither do I. What does that make us?25
Latest video turning into a beast, will probably end up being 25 minutes, all about numerology. I was cutting out photos of Adolf Hitler, Fred West and Donald Trump for it today. Will throw another chunk of hours at it tomorrow and get it finished. No choice really, got that $1000 penalty if I miss the deadline.
26
Watching basketball with ten thousand people. Guy to my right is a younger me, living and dying with every play. I lived and died on the inside though. This guy is wearing it all on his sleeve, jumping up and down, throwing his hands in the air, yelling obscenities at the refs. His team will lose and he’ll go home pissed off. Poor chap.
27
Bought me a new tripod today. Nothing fancy, but a definite improvement over what I was using. Need to start investing in some better video gear if I’m going to take this thing to the next level. I see certain YouTubers looking all shiny and fresh with their slightly blurred backgrounds and slick edits. That’s the icing on the cake, sure, but hey, who doesn’t like icing?
28
Made myself sit and meditate for 20 minutes this morning. I’d been getting up the past few days and diving straight into work, skipping the morning routine. As a result, I was finding it harder to get to sleep, waking up mid-thought, attention span shot, realizing the truth of something Blaise Pascal once wrote: “All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”
29
After all the hours spent on that numerology video, I published it today to a whimper. Meanwhile, I threw together a rhyme about my big nose, recorded it live, and that has 3x the views already. No complaints though. I’m proud of both videos, and I’ll keep on making more, adding to the body of work.
30
Tweaked my back last week on a simple stretch. Thought it’d be grand by now but still can’t walk properly. Found a chiropractor here, his English as broken as my Spanish. Odd times this eve in his clinic, me stripped down to me stripy jocks, him contorting my almost naked self in a variety of ways. I felt strangely comfortable there in my underwear with a fully dressed man.
31
Imagine what it must have been like, before photography, to be intimate with someone, to get up really close and look in their eyes. We kind of take it for granted now, because you can stare at eyes and faces up close and in brilliant detail via screens and magazines whenever you want. But before all that you really only got so close in love or war.
